What Past Relationships Say About You

Have you ever noticed how sometimes you get caught up in the same kinds of relationships? Maybe it’s with a person who might be called “needy.” Or maybe it’s with a person who ends up ghosting you.

All relationships, whether they end well or badly, offer valuable life lessons. We can learn from the mistakes that we made and continue the habits that made the relationship run smoothly.

Making an effort to not make the same mistakes that we have made in the past ensures that we find better ways to work through problems. Plus, we can better handle difficulties that have (in some cases) ruined relationships that could have ended much better than they did.

I mean, sometimes losing our relationships means finding ourselves. This means that we can learn what our strengths and our weaknesses are, and understand what went wrong.

If we understand what went wrong, we can try to change it before going into another relationship and making the same mistakes again. That is where counseling in Kansas can support you!

Breakups of Any Kind Affect Our Self Confidence and Self Esteem

Even if you weren’t necessarily “together,” any kind of breakup can have a massive effect on your confidence and self esteem.

It doesn’t matter if you lose a romantic relationship or a platonic one, because both can have lingering effects on you and your mental health.

Many of us tend to blame the loss of our relationship on ourselves, and believe that we were the only person who messed it all up. For example, we think things like “if only I wasn’t so clingy, we’d still be together,” or “it’s all my fault we aren’t together anymore,” or “I get why they don’t want to be my friend.”

And let’s talk about friendships for a minute. The loss of a friendship is sometimes more painful than losing a romantic relationship. We tend to believe that once we become friends with someone, there is a very slim chance for a “breakup.”

It never occurs to us that a friend might ghost us. Our friends are who we cry to when a potential partner ghosts us, not the ones who make us cry.

There can be a massive sense of loneliness that comes to play when we lose a friend, because those are who we least expect to leave us. Our relational therapists get it. It’s tough to accept change in a relationship status. That’s why we offer individual relationship therapy in Overland Park and Leavenworth for those seeking support.

Four Relationship Therapy Tips to Help Your Future Relationships

There are a number of things that you can do to ensure that you learn from your mistakes and heal from them while doing so. Here are a few tips we have gathered from psychotherapy in Overland Park, KS and Leavenworth, KS

1. Try to figure out what went wrong and avoid it so that it doesn’t happen again.

   It is much easier to deal with problems by avoiding them, but much healthier to deal with them head on. How can you work on facing your problems instead of running from them? By answering this question, you will be one step closer to having a healthy relationship.

2. Ask for feedback from someone that you trust.

   Find someone that you can trust and confide in, and ask them what they think are your strengths and weaknesses in relationships. From here, you can learn how to fix them.

3. Explore your upbringing to see what you feel comfortable with in interactions.

   If you feel yourself increasing emotional intensity in relationships, look at how you were brought up to find clues as to why you do this. Did your parents do the opposite and you just want to be seen? Or maybe you do the same thing as your own parents.

4. Learn your attachment style.

   Attachment styles greatly impact how we interact with others. You can do research on attachment styles and even take quizzes to find your own.

Relationship Therapy Can Help Your Future Relationships Succeed

1. You can develop an understanding of your own current coping strategies.

2. An understanding of both your positive and negative self narratives will be found.

3. You can read deeper into your automatic responses.

4. Your behavioral interactions with the people that you care about will drastically improve.

What Is Holding You Back from Beginning Self Exploration in Relationship Therapy?

You might be thinking that individual relationship therapy in Kansas is not necessary and that everything can be dealt with by yourself. Even so, our relationship therapists have specialized training in experiential therapies (therapy where you feel and are mindful of your internal experience of situations) and family of origin issues (the family you grew up in). They know how to help you.

You may also be doubtful about beginning individual relationship therapy because of the work that it entails. Okay, yes. That might be true. The good news is that our caring relationship therapists will walk you through every step of the process. You will not be alone in your journey.

Or maybe you are thinking, “I don’t have time” to start therapy. Well, we offer flexible scheduling and online therapy in Kansas to help make therapy fit into your busy schedule.

Begin Individual Relationship Therapy in Kansas with JS Therapy Group:

Now is the time to get some insight into yourself. Our team of caring relationship therapists is available to help you work through your past relationship interactions so you can start to feel confident again. To start counseling at JS Therapy Group located in Overland Park, KS, and Leavenworth, KS, or via online therapy in Kansas, follow these simple steps:

1. Contact JS Therapy Group,

2. Meet with one of our caring family therapists

3. Start feeling like a connection again!

Additional Therapy Services at JS Therapy Group

Individual Relationship therapy and couples therapy are not the only services we provide. We offer couples and marriage counseling, premarital counseling, trauma and PTSD treatment for children, trauma therapy and PTSD treatment, therapy for children and play therapy, teen therapy, family therapy, addictions counseling, anxiety treatment, and depression treatment. We also offer professional consultations and supervision opportunities. If you can’t make it to see one of our therapists for in-person counseling, consider online therapy in Kansas to meet your mental health needs. Contact us to get started or click on one of the links to learn more.