If we were to ask you what goes into making a healthy relationship, what would you say? A quick Google search reveals the following: curiosity, trust, communication, empathy, affection, patience, respect, and honesty…just to list a few.

Well, listen….we couldn’t disagree more!

Why do we blame?

Many of you have likely seen “The Break-Up” starring Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn. The famous fighting scene shows the couple bantering back and forth about everything that the other does that upsets them, specifically things that aren’t brought up when they are seen.

Fifty percent of initial marriages, sixty- seven of the next, and a massive seventy three percent of third marriages fail. These are all extremely high numbers when we are talking about the massive commitment that relationships (especially when it gets to the marriage stage) are.

We all want our relationships to be successful, and tell ourselves that we will never go as far as divorce.

Congratulations! You’re engaged, and you couldn’t be happier. Everything is going just as you hoped and dreamed that it would.

There is so much to do and even more to plan for the big day, which is taking way too long to arrive.

All of you and your partner’s focus is going towards details, details, details. Everything has to be absolutely perfect when that long awaited day finally arrives, with nothing to mess it up!

However, in all of this hustle and bustle, couples tend to overlook the most important aspect of all; their own relationship with each other.

From time to time, I couples who see some small improvements in their relationship and decide to quit counseling right after, thinking that they have accomplished the goals that they came to achieve. They feel like they are communicating better or listening to each other better.

Makes sense that some people would want to discontinue marriage counseling or couples counseling. But….it’s important to be aware that this is still too early to graduate from therapy.

Therapists often try to warn couples that despite seeing small changes (and things being a little bit better) that continuation is necessary to make the new habits and practices truly stick.

Just the other day, I was speaking with a friend of mine about how difficult it is to find a good therapist that takes their insurance and has openings in the near future. This is an issue for many people who are seeking out counseling, and in many cases, discourages them from looking any further.

Therapy classes, workshops, and groups are extremely beneficial and effective. However…