Relationship Counseling: The Process of Improving Connection in Relationships

Many people believe that for a healthy lasting relationship, the only essential is basic communication skills.

However, if you and your partner want a lasting change for the better, more effort is needed.

To do this, we need a second-order change or a change to our emotional foundation. This changes our mental and emotional domains.

Common insecurity is being nervous when it comes to talking about emotions or letting yourself be emotional.

In full truth, emotions are an extremely necessary part of life. They tell us when something we are doing or something being done is wrong. They tell us what feels good and what feels right.

We all need our emotions, and we should all listen to what they are trying to tell us.

Additionally, we need to share our emotions with others in order to truly understand them. This can be achieved in the process of relationship counseling in Kansas.

Loneliness is so Painful

You may be feeling alone in your relationship. In fact, you feel that this simply shouldn’t be the case because, by definition, a relationship should make you feel LESS alone.

Maybe you feel judged for not being good enough. Or maybe you feel like you are too much, too emotional, too talkative, too this, too that. Is it that you feel misunderstood? That “your people” don’t understand you? It may be that they don’t know what it is like to be you, and are making no effort to find out. 

All of these scenarios are valid reasons to feel that a relationship is off. It is completely normal to be unsure, even when you think that you should feel safe. Certain situations like these are bound to happen at some point in every relationship, and it is up to the couple in relationship counseling to find a way to work through them together. 

Emotionally Focused Relationship Counseling Can Help You Feel More Connected

At JS Therapy Group, we offer emotionally focused counseling. We focus on understanding where you are coming from and how you feel, and work with you to get through your pain points. 

Emotional accessibility is vital to this process.

This refers to how open you and your partner are with each other and how often this occurs. In order to have a good connection, you both must be emotionally accessible to each other. You both need to be open to each other.

Another key element in a relationship is emotional responsiveness.

Does your partner respond to you? Is your partner able to turn toward you when you are showing emotions? Both of these questions relate back to being emotionally responsive.

The third essential in a connected relationship is emotional engagement.

This could mean that you and your partner have enough trust instilled in each other to reveal new things. It could also mean telling your partner something that you are nervous about telling others and knowing when something difficult to say must be said.

The final must-have in a relationship is attunement.

This means effort must be made to understand your partner and their emotions. This is the gateway to a deep and lasting emotional connection in your relationship.

Tips to Help Build Connection

There are a few extremely valuable tips we teach in relationship counseling that can be used to build your connection to your partner. When you put effort into following these, you will be put on the right path toward a lasting relationship.

1. Identify when you and your partner or even your family get caught up in negative patterns of interaction. When you find yourself caught up in these, be sure to communicate your concerns and come up with a plan of action to improve.

2. Make sure to take turns as both the speaker and the listener to ensure that both parties understand how the other is feeling. Once all feelings are put out there, you can talk through what is troubling you. 

3. Work on validating each other’s feelings and thoughts. You never want anyone to feel unheard or disregarded. This doesn’t necessarily mean that you agree on everything, it simply means that you want to understand where the other person is coming from. 

4. Slow down your interactions. Be sure to really comprehend the words that are coming out of everyone’s mouth. Just because everything has been said doesn’t mean it has all been heard. 

5. Don’t forget the positive. For every one negative interaction, there are five positives. You only need to have the want to see them. 

Begin Relationship Counseling for Improving Connections with JS Therapy Group

Now is the time to end the loneliness and find your connection. Our team of caring therapists is available to help you work through your relationship struggles so you can get back to making the happy memories you’ve dreamed of making. To start counseling at JS Therapy Group located in Overland Park, KS, and Leavenworth, KS, or via online therapy in Kansas, follow these simple steps:

1. Contact JS Therapy Group,

2. Meet with one of our caring family therapists

3. Start feeling like a connection again!

Other Counseling Services at JS Therapy Group

Couple therapy is not the only service we offer in our Leavenworth, KS, and Overland Park, KS counseling centers. Other mental health services JS Therapy Group provides include anxiety treatment, therapy for children and play therapy, trauma and PTSD treatment, addictions counseling, trauma and PTSD treatment for children, premarital counseling, family therapy, depression treatment, affordable and reduced therapy, and workshops, classes, and groups. We also offer professional consultations and supervision opportunities. If you can’t make it to see one of our therapists for in-person counseling, consider online therapy in Kansas to meet your mental health needs. Contact us to get started or click on one of the links to learn more. Contact JS Therapy Group.